MY DREAD GIRL - A SPOOF OF MY DREAM GIRL

It all started with Aditya writing a post about his "dream girl". It was basically about this girl who appeared in his dream and stole his heart, apparently. A huge movie fan that Iam, I was touched by his romantic story. And so I thought that maybe its time for me to have such a dream too. And so I waited and I hoped and I slept and bam, I had a dream....

I remember the exact location. It was HELL(what the heck was i doing thr??!!). Anyways, there i was standing in the queue, pissing my pants off, looking at people getting some of the goriest of punishments whilst waiting for my own. There was this amazingly gorgeous female whose trial was going on. Chatter Guptil(The English version of Chitragupta) read out the list of sins committed by her and I thought, "Not bad enough to deserve much". Suddenly, Satan frowned, "1000 lashes and then drown her in boiling oil". Now, I wasn't sure what sins I had committed but I sure as hell couldn't have done any better than her. Moreover, she was so beautiful. I mean, Satan had to be so gay to have dished out such a punishment to a girl like her. If that was indeed true, i thought, my odds of a slightly lenient punishment had gone up. Anyways, just as I was acquainting myself with fellow sinners, suddenly, this girl came up to me and gave me a smile. She was dark, 4 ft tall, 200kgs wearing a black skirt and had those evil horns and her smile, oh my god, those punishments didn't seem so bad anymore. She was easily the ugliest thing I had ever seen in my life despite considering the fact that I had spent 4 yrs of my life in Chennai. I guess she was one of those who executed the orders of the Satan. Anyways, she told me she felt like she knew me before and I was like "What the hell!! I'd never been to Africa in my entire life. It is impossible!!". She nonchalantly replied, "Whatever dear!! I love you". Those very words had barely left her mouth that I realized the gravity of the situation and I started running for my life. I looked back only to find that there was a huge battalion of gigantic demons chasing me but none of them scared me more than that ugly bitch hunting me down. I was running as fast as I could but she kept gaining on me. A million things were going on in my mind at that very moment. "What does Satan feed these sickos that they just don't seem to tire at all", "Did I just worsen my odds by trying to escape?", "What sins did I commit in the first place, that Iam having to go through all this trauma". So, there I was, running, trying to save myself from hell in hell and then I hear the sweet music of "Viva la vida". It was my cellphone.

Luckily for me, before I could dare end that nightmare of mine, my professor calls me and asks me to come to the lab. I couldn't thank him more for what he had just done.

END OF STORY

P.S: I am not a racist!! I just like nigger jokes :D